


Interlaced

by izzylawliet



Category: VIXX
Genre: First Time, Intimacy, M/M, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-20
Updated: 2018-06-20
Packaged: 2019-05-25 20:58:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,565
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14985461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/izzylawliet/pseuds/izzylawliet
Summary: Taekwoon's hands were a great expression of emotion.





	Interlaced

     Taekwoon’s fingers slid along the page of his novel when he turned it. He was reading each line with care, observing each use of vocabulary and punctuation as though the purpose of the book were written in those alone. The story was written out with words that flowed together with intentional delicacy. His nights, when not overworked from performing, were always spent this way. It was his favorite past time.

     His attention was brought from the story unfolding on the pages when the door to his room was opened. Normally, a frown would touch his lips if not for the who it was that walked through it.

     “Hyogi.” Taekwoon smiled, his long fingers ear marking the page with a gentleness he always saved for his books. He set the book off to his dresser and was not surprised when the younger male made his way over to the bed and took a seat without waiting for an invitation. They both knew that he was forever welcome and it was always more trouble to argue about the merits of good manners than to let it slide and happen again.

     “Hyung.” At least Sanghyuk still referred to him respectfully. Though, that hardly mattered at this point. Taekwoon would never have corrected him when they were alone like this. “Is it okay if I sit in here with you for a while? Jaehwan-hyung is being loud and noisy in the living room.”

     A small smile touched Taekwoon’s lips. He knew how loud that the others could get and how destructive they could be. Which is why it wasn’t rare for Sanghyuk and him to be hiding out the way that they were at that moment. And Taekwoon was more than willing to allow Sanghyuk into this space with him. It was still a safe space, and maybe more so when the younger was with him.

     It didn’t require permission, but Sanghyuk was waiting either way; he waited for that small nod from the elder to welcome him near and once it was given, Sanghyuk is slipping forward on the bed to settle down next to the elder man. It was a way in which they’d sat many times before, and it was easy for the two of them to fall against each other while Taekwoon opened his book once more to resume his read. Though, he’d find the words not making much sense once the scent of the other wafted over him, distracting him thoroughly. He had no choice but to stare at the page and hope that Hyuk didn’t realize how it was over two minutes since he turned the page last. The maknae was on his phone, so it was unlikely.

     At a particularly loud commotion from the living room, Taekwoon ear marked the current page and turned to look at the maknae with a knowing smile. Of course, the others were getting up into trouble but Hakyeon should be out there taking care of it all.

     “Hyung’s out there.” Hyuk mirrored and responded to Taekwoon’s thoughts as though he could read his mind. He’d always been so good at it. He had learned over the years how to read Taekwoon’s thoughts and moods with just a glance, to see the shift in his demeanor and know what it meant without having to wonder. The assurance is what Taekwoon was needing at that moment, and he could give that without hesitation.

     The book was still closed and he’s resting it on the bedside table as there was no way that he would be able to finish reading it. He was too close to Sanghyuk to be able to concentrate on the story he had been so engrossed in just minutes before.

     “Hyung?” Sanghyuk’s voice brought Taewkoon’s attention back to him — not that he had ever not been focusing on the man in the first place, just he didn’t know it — and he turned to look at him curiously. “Did I bother you? I can...go? If you’d like…” Taekwoon shook his head and settled a hand on Sanghyuk’s arm as though the younger man would be rising from the bed to leave, even though he hadn’t made a single motion to leave.

     “No. Don’t go.”

     The two fell back into their silence near immediately, the comfortable way in which they were together just the natural state of being for them. And neither would have it any other way. It didn’t mean that Taekwoon could go back to reading, though; no, he’s too distracted by the warmth that radiated from the younger, that _pulsated_ from him in waves that crashed over Taekwoon with such torrential force that he’s left breathless and unable to come up for air that he had no desire for anyways. He liked drowning in anything that came to Sanghyuk.

     Then again, Sanghyuk had become the very air in his lungs.

 

&

 

     Taekwoon’s fingers were flying across the screen of his phone, posting yet another video on his instagram of something or another — he could no longer be bothered to finish posting it when Sanghyuk walked into the room wearing only joggers. While it was common for all of them to walk around in whatever state they wished ( if they didn’t have at least a ‘must wear bottoms’ rule, then they’d have a full view of Wonshik more often than they wished. ) And so watching the way the maknae walked through the house, heading into the kitchen for something or another. There was a sheen of sweat along his skin and it made Taekwoon’s breath hitch — and yet when Sanghyuk turns to look at him, the smile brings purpose back into his lungs.

     “Hey, hyung.” It’s without an invitation again that Sanghyuk is dropping down onto the couch next to the elder, a water bottle in hand, and looking over his shoulder to see what he was posting. “Oh! Is that your nephew? The fans _love_ when you post videos like that.” The statement was unnecessary, but it was one that some _how_ brought a flush to Taekwoon’s cheeks.

     Or maybe it was the heady scent that wafted over him. It was a drink after a long day, the way it flooded his senses and was threatening to take away his inhibitions. It weakened his resolve and yet all he could do was tip his head up and look at the _larger_ man who had taken residence up on the couch with him.

     It was almost as though Sanghyuk knew that Taekwoon wasn’t in a talkative mood. He fell silent happily, or seemingly so if that smile was anything to go off of. Maybe it was a knowing smile. Maybe it was a mocking smile. Either way, Taekwoon found that the smile was sweet enough to keep his thoughts successfully distracted. It’s all Sanghyuk ever was; a distraction, yet Taekwoon has no desire to get rid of him.

     “Are you going to bed soon?” Taekwoon decided to ask, his eyes staying on the screen as he attempted to post the video of his nephew as he had in the first place.

     “Nah, I’m too wired after that workout.”

 _Ah_ , Taekwoon figured it had to be as much to cause Sanghyuk to be sweaty, but normally the kid would shower directly after whatever routine he would take up in his bedroom. Why, this time, did he come out into the living room to be with Taekwoon? It’s as though he _knew_ that he drove the vocalist crazy. It was like he _knew_ that the presence of him alone was enough to distract Taekwoon from anything productive.

     “I’m just gonna sit out here with you.” The way in which Sanghyuk spoke this made Taekwoon’s heart patter in his chest and he was left speechless for a moment before shutting off his phone to turn and look at the other, the man who was unknowingly driving him insane.

     “Why would you do that? I’m not doing anything.” Taekwoon questioned. His slanted eyes observed as the other grinned with that bright smile. It often took his breath away, and it was no different then. No answer was given as Sanghyuk pulled out his phone to idly scroll along it as well, enough to make his point that he wouldn’t be moving anytime soon.

 

&

 

     Taekwoon’s fingers slid along the wet, tiled wall in an attempt to grasp it, grasp _something_. He’s breathing out shakily, his forehead dropped against his forearm as the water poured over his back. The steam from the shower had long since filled the bathroom and made it almost impossibly stuffy in the room, making even harder for him to gather proper breath. If he were at all interested in breathing correctly, he would have left the shower long ago.

     Instead, his dominant hand was stroking himself almost frantically. He had been worked up to this all week, to a point in which he couldn’t stand any longer because he’s _angry_ that he’d been brought to such a point. Normally, he’d have better control over himself. Something about this week drove deep into him, right under his skin with such precision that he couldn’t stand it any longer. It was the reason he was there to begin with.

     The thoughts of those thick arms surrounding him, the way that they would hold him close, make him feel small, would always be enough to get him like this. Imagining how he’d happily suffocate in that scent that was raw and definitely Sanghyuk as he was devoured in the best of ways, in ways he never had been before. Taekwoon was struggling to stand on his own two feet while his hand worked himself in the ways only he ever had, drawing out the pleasure that would do him in, but wouldn’t be enough. It was never enough.

     Through the stream of the water, Taekwoon could hear the others out in the dorm, noises of living as they all started to wake up. It only went to remind him how long he’d been in the shower that morning, working himself to a point of pleasure he wished he didn’t have to reach on his own. If only there were another’s hand working his length, pulling out the noises that he was doing his best to subdue and silence. Quiet little noises escaped, drowned out by the steady pulsing of the showerhead as it continued to pour almost _too_ hot water over Taekwoon’s sensitive skin.

     All the noises from the other guys only urged him to complete, to finish before they’d come in and bother him, demanding their turn in the bathroom or just wondering if he were still _alive_.

     The answer would be the same either way.

     Choked gasps leave him when he’s reaching his completion, a sharp _sting_ of pleasure. It was never a fulfilling sensation, but it helped unbind the tension in his body that built up since the last time he’d found time to himself. He was shaking as he refused to let himself wind down from the pleasure and instead finish his shower.

     It’s with shaky fingers that he’s finally unlocking the bathroom door to find the man to cause his frustration standing there, a tired smile on his face.

     “Morning, hyung. Did you leave us hot water?” He teased, and it caused Taekwoon’s heart to stutter in his chest, and a stirring of arousal to return even if he had just done his best to rid himself of it. His cheeks were already red from the steamy shower, and so weren’t noticeably different when he was faced with the taller man.

     “At least enough for you.” His words were meant to be a tease, meant to be a joke, and yet they came out in a tone that belied what he’d been doing in the shower. And even though he noticed the smirk grow from the smile on Hyuk’s expression, Taekwoon was ducking away and pretending he saw nothing. He couldn’t bear _that_ kind of embarrassment.

 

&

 

     Taekwoon’s fingers were wrapped around the stem of the wine glass, cupping the bulb of it and he’s holding it steady while adjusting the settings of the soundboard with the other. It’d been too long since he had spent late nights in the studio and while he was determined to make a productive night of it, the stress had proved to be too much. The first wine bottle had already been thrown into the trash and he was less productive than he wished to be. But he was alone, it was quiet, and he wouldn’t be bothered — or, at least, the chances of being bothered were so slim that he didn’t worry about locking the door.

     He should have.

     Or he’s glad that he didn’t.

     Sanghyuk stepped inside with a small bag at his side, his smile understanding and his eyes warm as he said nothing. His ability to read and understand Taekwoon’s moods was something else. He had no idea how one person could see into him so easily, with such an understanding of him that Taekwoon is left speechless by it half the time.

     “I see you aren’t getting as much work done as I thought you’d be.” Sanghyuk’s voice finally echoed through the room when the food had been pulled from the takeout bag he’d brought, and a bottle of wine from the backpack he’d brought with him. Taekwoon wasn’t sure what else was kept in the bag, but he also didn’t care all that much.

     Taekwoon poured a little more of the wine and held it out for the younger whose fingers touch his with such purpose that Taekwoon nearly dropped the glass.

     “I wasn’t feeling it like I thought I was. I went down to the corner market.” Taekwoon explained as though he had to excuse his actions to the maknae. A stress started to weigh down on him and he’s struggling to find the proper words — though, that was the alcohol’s fault, he’d realize at a much later time. “Why are you here?”

     Normally, Taekwoon just accepted Sanghyuk’s presence. He never questioned why the maknae would always show up at his side, or join him in a room that he thought no one knew his occupation of. And yet, somehow, Taekwoon just always accepted that Sanghyuk _knew_.

     This sudden questioning of the Sanghyuk’s purpose there had them both pausing in their actions, though only for a moment. Sanghyuk is finishing the large swig of the wine he’d been handed before he spoke, “I didn’t want you pulling an all-nighter, hyung.”

 _Of course_ , it was for an innocent reason. Why had Taekwoon thought for any amount of time that it could be for any other sort of reason? What was _wrong_ with him?

     Shaking his head of those thoughts, Taekwoon finished the glass that was handed back to him. The red wine would normally have a bitter flavor as it slid down his throat, but he’d long since been numbed to that — maybe the first bottle had done it for him. Either way, he knew he was intoxicated when he felt the room swaying around him, but then Sanghyuk’s hand was resting on his arm, steadying him and there was that warm smile on his face. And then those eyes…

     Those eyes that saw Taekwoon no matter how hard he strived to hide _that_ part of him even while letting the rest of him just _be_ . Taekwoon felt almost exposed in front of the man, seeing the way that he was looking _into_ him like he had dozens, hundreds, _countless_ times before. Taekwoon felt exposed. But he felt safe.

     It was the wine.

     “Let’s finish this bottle and then we’ll get you home, okay, hyung?” Sanghyuk’s voice was music. It was the purest sound that Taekwoon had ever heard and he’d happily give his own voice to make sure that he never lost that. He wouldn’t be able to live he didn’t hear those tones and pitches that were perfect, the way that laugh would send fire through his chest.

     A soft noise of disagreement left Taekwoon. “I don’t want to go home.” He spoke with a clarity that he normally didn’t have. “I want to stay with you.” An almost giggle bubbled in his throat, but he refused to let it escape, not when he had all of his focus and attention on Sanghyuk, waiting with bated breath to hear him speak once again, to see that smile again, because it’d already been too long since he’d seen it last.

     If Taekwoon were sober, he would once again be in awe of the way that Sanghyuk just _knew_ that this is what the man needed and where he was supposed to be. Taekwoon would do no good going home at that hour, waking the others in his drunken state — because the bottle and half caused his cheeks to flush and eyes to gloss over and his impulse control was shot. And Sanghyuk understood all of this.

     Taekwoon knew that he understood, because he saw the way Sanghyuk took a relaxing posture, the way he leaned back and took the wine glass once more to pour more of the alcohol that his hyung had had enough of. Taekwoon wouldn’t be reaching for it anymore, but he’d gladly watch the way Sanghyuk’s eyes locked on his while his head tipped just enough to drink in some of the red liquid, lips bracketing the rim of the glass. Taekwoon watched how Hyuk lowered the glass and that pink tongue slipped over his lips to gather the remaining red — though most of it stained his blush colored lips at that point.

     “We can stay.”

 

&

 

     Taekwoon’s fingers gripped the bedding with an unrelenting force. The window shook again from the force of the wind, the howling of it startling him from yet another fitful sleep. His knuckles were white and they ached from holding on through the night. He’d hardly been able to get much sleep at that point, but he kept trying. They had schedules the next day, and yet Taekwoon would be in no state to attend them if this storm kept up the way it did.

     Soon enough, the near silence of the dorm became even more so when the white noise disappeared.

     The power was off.

     It would soon grow uncomfortably warm and humid in the dorm, but Taekwoon knew he wouldn’t sleep anyways. He finally released the bedding to tip his head back, black hair shifting along the pillow while he peered out the window; lightning regularly lit up the sky, thunder rumbling in sync with it, and water pounded against the window without mercy. How the others were sleeping through this storm would forever be a mystery to Taekwoon.

     Yet, his door was being pushed open moments after he had had such a thought. He didn’t even have to turn to look to know who it was. His eyes were trained on the storm outside as he felt the telltale signs of someone crawling into bed with him. The lumbering way that he was covered before finally joined in the large bed, was enough to let Taekwoon know that it _was_ Sanghyuk. And that thick arm that encircled his waist with a large hand that splayed over his bare side — definitely Sanghyuk.

     Minutes later, when Taekwoon finally turned his head to look at the man, he found Sanghyuk having been looking at him the entire time, eyes tired with sleep in the corners, but open to meet his own. Taekwoon felt a warmth spread through him at this realization. Before he could even question what brought Sanghyuk in, brought him so close, the maknae was answering with ease.

     “You said the last storm kept you up all night. It kept me up, too.” His words were soft spoken, a low tone as he continued, “I figured we could be up together.”

     Such simple logic.

     Taekwoon once again took stock in the fact that Sanghyuk wanted to be with _him_. For whatever purpose, Sanghyuk had sought him out once again. It was enough to make Taekwoon wonder seriously: Did Sanghyuk know of his desires and feelings?

     Taekwoon’s expressive eyes were open still, struggling through the dark to try and see more of Sanghyuk, to get a better understanding of him and his actions that still hardly made sense to him. Why was the maknae constantly at his side? Why was the maknae so keen on always being with him?

     “Stop overthinking things.” Sanghyuk spoke, once again reading Taekwoon as though his thoughts were splayed out between them and he only had to pick and choose which part of Taekwoon’s deepest secret that he wanted to focus on for the moment. “This doesn’t require you thinking about it. Just...let it be.”

     Taekwoon nodded his head, closing his eyes after a moment as though to hide, because he couldn’t bring himself to press closer to the maknae, or to turn away from him. He could only accept it, as he’d just been told to.

 

&

 

     Taekwoon’s fingers may have been thin and long, dainty in a feminine way, but they were dwarfed when he held them next to Sanghyuk’s. Which he did often. Just as they always were, paired off somewhere, just the two of them, Taekwoon held his hand over Sanghyuk’s and watched how his strong hand curled around his own with such ease; it took his breath away.

     This time, they were hidden off in Taekwoon’s bedroom, the door mostly shut while the others had some sort of marathon going on. Yet, in their world, everything was silent and just the way that they both wanted it to be. Words were unnecessary between them as Sanghyuk allowed Taekwoon to run those thin fingertips along the palm of his wider hand. Taekwoon loved to watch the way Sanghyuk’s fingers would twitch and the way he’d want to pull away, but never did.

     Sanghyuk let their fingers entwine together when Taekwoon deemed it time to and the elder knew the amount of impatience a normal person would have if they were sitting where Sanghyuk was. Yet, the maknae was unbelievably patient with him, letting him do this. Taekwoon didn’t have any special interest in Sanghyuk’s hands, but he loved the way it felt when they brushed together. He loved when Sanghyuk would run a finger from the tip of Taekwoon’s middle digit straight down to the heel of his palm; it would send shivers down his spine.

     Taekwoon’s breath hitched when Sanghyuk squeezed his hand and it drew his attention up from them to look at the younger man, the one who was being so patient that even Taekwoon was wondering what kept him around, what drew him to be this way when someone as handsome as Sanghyuk could have anyone that he wanted. Why would he want to be with someone like Taekwoon, so inexperienced and unable to just _act_ on these desires that had been building up for years now?

     All too soon, their hands were sliding away from one another, disconnecting even though Taekwoon’s fingers were sliding as though they tried to stay in contact with the other for as long as possible. But it was enough. Taekwoon had taken enough from Sanghyuk this time, at least enough for himself and he may never be able to give back to Sanghyuk the proper amount, but he would do his best to try in the future.

     “I’m going to go watch TV with the others.” Sanghyuk rose from his seat on the bed easily, though something about his posture seemed a bit guarded. It drew Taekwoon’s attention and caused him to look at the maknae with a question resting on his lips. “Don’t worry. I’m okay. You should join us, though. We’d all love to have you out…”

     He held out the hand that they had just been intimately entwined with and Taekwoon wasn’t hesitating before he was taking it. He stood from the bed, standing too close to Sanghyuk for him to think properly, but allowed it to pass as they both made their way out of the bedroom — hands still connected.

 

&

 

     Taekwoon’s fingers were balled into fists of anger, frustration really, and he was left helpless against it all. It sometimes occurred that he would get worked up like this after so long without that quiet time that he needed so badly. It just happened to be more worse this time, the way that the others were yelling at one another, bickering over something or another. Even after all these years together, they grew irritated with one another, the grew upset, and they said things that would later be taken back, but for now, it was a tense situation for all involved.

     Just as he opened his mouth to make another snarky comment, Taekwoon’s hand is grasped by a much larger one, a familiar one, and he’s pulled from the situation entirely. The two of them leave the room and make an escape to Taekwoon’s room despite the yelling that only intensified after his unexpected departure. The door shut and locked behind him and yet Taekwoon found it easier to walk to his window and peer outside of it, down at the street below as though all his anger would fall from him and over the edge of it.

     Taekwoon felt Sanghyuk’s hands as they slid up his sides, sliding down his arms and then curling around the fists that were still clenched tight. He drew them out, massaging the tension from them with easy motions. He was kind to Taekwoon and the elder could tell that he was doing what he felt was right, helping him calm down. Taekwoon didn’t necessarily want to calm down, though. He’s wanting to be angry, feel frustrated, because that fight had been...ridiculous.

     But Sanghyuk was touching him, massaging the center of his palms, calming him with actions that Taekwoon would normally use on him to help him sleep. It was odd, to be the one comforted, to feel that strong body behind him and not lean back against it immediately. He felt that that’s what he should do; he should curl back and let Sanghyuk take care of him.

     And so he does.

     With a soft sigh, Taekwoon is relaxing back to let his back fold into the perfect width of Sanghyuk’s chest and he moved his hands up and to the sides, just enough to stretch out Sanghyuk’s fingers before he slotted them all together with his own. And then he placed their arms around his own waist and just stood there.

     It was a lot more than what Taekwoon had thought that Sanghyuk would ever want with him and he was wanting to bask in the sensation, but a part of him was telling him that it couldn’t last. It just couldn’t. How could Sanghyuk continue to be patient?

     He didn’t know, but he hoped that he would.

 

&

 

     Taekwoon’s fingers were lined up perfectly with Sanghyuk’s as they lay in bed together, quiet and calm while they were enjoying the silence of the dorm. It was late night and everyone was asleep, except for these two as the storm raged on outside of their building. This was what they did now, while it rained, while it stormed and shook the building and sometimes shut the power off. And yet everyone else slept through it all.

     Taekwoon looked at their hands that were palm to palm and he felt even more small against the maknae who had grown into such a fine, young man who was strong, intelligent, and kind. Oh, so kind.

     Sanghyuk slowly let his hand slip from Taekwoon’s, the first time he ever ended the contact prematurely and it left Taekwoon confused as he turned to look at the man with curiosity burning in his gaze. His lips were parted as though he’d speak, but something kept him quiet — maybe it was the silence of the dorm, or maybe it was the look in Sanghyuk’s eyes - Taekwoon would never be able to recall correctly.

     His lips were still parted when he watched Sanghyuk close, feeling how he cupped his jaw and cheek in the tenderest of manners. It wasn’t what they usually did, after all, they’d never done this and Taekwoon was left wondering what it was that he was thinking, what was spurring this on. Had he become too impatient?

     But what was Taekwoon waiting for to begin with?

     His lips were touched, the barest of touches when Sanghyuk moved forward and he was left breathless when Sanghyuk siphoned his air from him with a kiss so light that Taekwoon can’t recall if he ever experienced such a first kiss. He hadn’t had a lot of firsts, but he knew that this first with Sanghyuk was the way all firsts should be.

     He felt the way that Sanghyuk slid his hand back down to his own, gathering it up into a gentle embrace with Taekwoon’s fingers ending up in Sanghyuk’s palm. The way that he was holding Taekwoon, so delicate, made the the elder man feel special. It made him feel like this wasn’t just a once off instant, but actually something that Sanghyuk had been building up to. Had he understood Taekwoon more than the vocalist even knew?

     It seemed so.

 

&

 

     Taekwoon’s fingers were inquisitive as they ran over the pads of Sanghyuk’s hand while the younger man slept through the early morning hours. He had no desire to wake the man, but laying next to him had proved a distraction even from sleep — though this was a rare occurrence as Sanghyuk was more often than not something soothing that allowed him to sleep easy.

     If only Taekwoon were able to feel guilty when he feels the man shift, his face scrunching in a protest of the light that was shining down on him, but then his eyelashes were fluttering for a moment before parting slowly. His brown eyes were twinkling as they were given the pleasure of seeing Taekwoon first thing upon opening for the day. And then that mouth was curving up into a gentle smile and was already taking a kiss from Taekwoon’s — as this was habit and expected of one another in the mornings that they woke up together.

     The kiss shocked Taekwoon and yet he could see the way that Sanghyuk was already smiling, bringing his large hand to cup Taekwoon’s rounded cheek to engage in another kiss, a deeper kiss. It was rare that their kisses would start off like this and it somewhat threw Taekwoon for a spin, but he recovered quickly. He was responding with ease, with a practiced motion underlying ever movement of his lips and his tongue when Sanghyuk was finally pressing into his mouth. It was growing hotter; having Sanghyuk’s breath in his mouth, to have his large form coming closer, pressing closer, but Taekwoon is actually welcoming it, finding the early morning chill to not be so bad when he has Sanghyuk.

     As different as it was, Taekwoon found himself responding, his fingers curling into Sanghyuk’s hair that he had reached for, and successfully bringing him closer. He brought the man closer until it only made sense for Sanghyuk to be over him — which he then was. He was left breathless for a moment, feeling the way the maknae entirely encased him and the kiss was broken due to it.

     Sanghyuk’s eyes were dark as they stared down at him, but Taekwoon wasn’t sure that he knew how to feel or respond just yet. But, of course, Sanghyuk knew this. The younger was kissing him again. Taekwoon was wrapping his arms around the younger’s neck, holding him in and drawing him closer while they kissing in such a languid way that Taekwoon found breath harder and harder to come by, yet he wasn’t stopping. He didn’t want to stop.

 _All good things must end_ , Taekwoon figured when Sanghyuk’s lips were parting from his in such a way that he was left wanting more — and he rarely ever wanted _more_. He was panting without being aware of it, and he was holding fast to Sanghyuk, wanting to keep the man close to him and yet he was slipping from his embrace either way, whispering something about needing to get up, needing to get back to his room and Taekwoon didn’t understand, but he acquiesced.

 

&

 

     Taekwoon’s fingers itched as they rest in his own lap. They were all gathered around and watching a movie and Sanghyuk was _so_ close to him, but Taekwoon wasn’t sure if he should take his hand quite yet. He wasn’t sure if that’d be _okay_ yet. He was probably overthinking it, but he didn’t know how not to at that point. He wanted to reach for his hand, to feel those long fingers in between this, curled in towards his palm and to feel the rough pads touching his sensitive skin, but…

     … would that be okay?

     Taekwoon didn’t have to do decide. It was another moment in which Sanghyuk just _knew_. He read Taekwoon with such ease that he was reaching over to take Taekwoon’s hand from his lap. He drew it into his own and encased it with his larger hand, positioning their fingers in an interlaced position and locking them together. It sent shivers down Taekwoon’s spine as he simple looked down to see how he was being held in such an intimate manner.

     And it was intimate. So very intimate that it left Taekwoon’s breath hitched and his attention diverted from the television. The words from the actors meant nothing anymore as all Taekwoon could hear was the sound of blood rushing through his ears, filling his conscious thoughts with nothing but the focus on Sanghyuk’s fingers massaging and kneading at his palm. It was such an intimate thing to do and Taekwoon knew that Sanghyuk was aware of that; he’d know what he was doing to Taekwoon before he even did it — he always knew.

     When Taekwoon could no longer pay attention to the movie, Sanghyuk was removing the both of them from the room. Without care to the looks that they were garnering from the others, Sanghyuk kept his hand in Taekwoon’s as he lead the elder to his room, knowing that their time was always spent in Taekwoon’s room for a reason — he didn’t share with anyone else.

     Sanghyuk shut the door behind Taekwoon and it left the elder wondering why. It was soon to be answered by the way Sanghyuk was then pressing him up against the wall in such a gentle manner — there hands are still interwoven — that Taekwoon is looking up at him with wide, curious eyes. He didn’t understand. This was more forward than Sanghyuk had ever been, and this was entering into territory that he wasn’t sure he was ready to experience quite yet. But he would try with Sanghyuk; he would see where this would lead.

     He rest against the door without thinking much about it, looking at Sanghyuk as he gently pressed his arm against the door, their fingers interlaced. Taekwoon tipped his head to the side, lips parting in question but no sound falling from them all the while. He watched the way Sanghyuk smiled at him, his other hand lifting to run through the strands that fell into Taekwoon’s face. And he was wondering what was on the other’s mind; what thoughts occupied him at that moment as he stared at him.

     Taekwoon was pleased to feel Sanghyuk’s mouth on his again, and he was pleased to feel Sanghyuk’s thick body press up against his in such a suggestive way. It was everything _right_ when he was with Sanghyuk. It was just what he wanted, needed, and would strive to have _more_ of.

     His lips parted and he was releasing a noise into Sanghyuk’s mouth while they kiss. He was moving his free hand up to curl around the back of Sanghyuk’s neck, holding onto him to keep him where they were and it drew a noise from Sanghyuk that was unlike any he had heard before. It was deep and guttural, one that sent shocks to every nerve ending in Taekwoon’s body. It was the most arousing thing that Taekwoon had ever heard and for a moment he was pressing closer before he had to pull back. He needed to see Sanghyuk and see what the man was thinking, to see his eyes and understand what was going on in his mind at that moment.

     And what he saw only caused him further confusion. There was a darkness, not a negative one, that filled those brown eyes Taekwoon could have stared into for forever, gazed into until the end of time and may have even loved more than his hands.

     “Hyung, I need you.” Sanghyuk spoke needily. It was a tone that Taekwoon hadn’t often heard and he was left wondering, for just a moment, what it was that he was needing. Until it clocked.

     “Hyogi..” Taekwoon gasped out. He understood why Sanghyuk had come to this point, but he wasn’t sure that the maknae understood the extent of Taekwoon’s experience and what it was he was asking to give. Or maybe he did. Sanghyuk had understood everything else about him already. “I’m a—”

     “I know.” Sanghyuk cut him off, a small smile on his face because he _did_ understand how hard it was for Taekwoon to say such a thing out loud and he understood that that was the reason things progressed at such a slow pace. Taekwoon should have known that Sanghyuk would realize that part of him. “I know, and that’s okay. We don’t have to...but I needed to tell you. I need you to know: I need you.”

     The words were so simple. They were meaningless if the context wasn’t known and Taekwoon did comprehend the context. His cheeks were red and he was wanting to turn away but something in Sanghyuk’s gaze kept him locked and stationed where he was. He met those eyes and was unwilling to turn away from them when Sanghyuk was giving so much of himself over with those words that should have been meaningless. Taekwoon wouldn’t take them for granted, though.

     He nodded and let his hand slide up to tangle into Sanghyuk’s hair slowly, massaging his scalp like he would when Sanghyuk couldn’t sleep or when he wasn’t feeling well. He did acknowledge the patience that Sanghyuk was expending every day being with him and he did understand the pain it must cause him to not have something _more_ from a man he was clearly interested in.

     “Not yet.” Taekwoon insisted in such a soft voice that he noticed how Sanghyuk leaned forward to catch his words even though they were already intimately close together. Sanghyuk’s long fingers slid down Taekwoon’s hand and encircled his wrist for the remainder of his descent. “Soon.” The promise was there, it had always been there, but to have it said out loud caused a noticeable shift in Sanghyuk’s demeanor — one that Taekwoon was okay with, didn’t mind, and even appreciated. They’d get there eventually and Taekwoon is glad that Sanghyuk is willing to wait.

 

&

 

     Taekwoon’s fingers pressed along each designated key with a skill he had honed and practiced over the years. His eyes were closed while he pressed each key with precision. The sound flowed from the instrument with ease and intended perfection. His body felt light, stress-free while he rocked and moved with every press of his fingers. It was a song he knew from heart, one he’d known from since he was a child and it showed in his mastering of the piece. And it was calming.

     It wasn’t until the song was coming to an end that Taekwoon felt the presence of another and without even looking he knew just who it was. The way that the air of the room fit around the other body in the room, Taekwoon didn’t have to turn to know that it was Sanghyuk, the man who stood with a smile on his face before he approached the elder.

     Taekwoon had a soft blush on his cheeks, though there was no point to. The others, the _world_ , had heard him play before and it was nothing new. Something about this piece, though, was so intimate to Taekwoon that he liked to keep it to himself, and yet Sanghyuk had witnessed it, listened to it, and Taekwoon couldn’t figure out if the feeling in his chest was because he was angry with the other or not…

     “Hyung, that was beautiful,” Sanghyuk spoke as he slid onto the bench next to the elder man, not kissing him in greeting as Taekwoon knew most couples would — because a couple is what they were — but instead he reached forward to take one of Taekwoon’s hands into his own and gently ran his fingertips along the center of his palm like they often did with one another. “I’d been looking for you.”

     Taekwoon nodded his head as he looked down and watched their hands as he normally would. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you where I’d be… I just needed to get out of the dorm.” He explained while using his other hand to trace along the length of Sanghyuk’s pointer finger — another new sort of touch, but one that Taekwoon was glad that _he_ were initiating.

     “Everyone is going out tonight.” Sanghyuk stated softly, his fingers then drawing patterns along his palm. “I thought it would be nice… for us to have the dorm to ourselves for a while…” Taekwoon didn’t have to be a genius to understand the underlying meaning behind Sanghyuk’s words, the implication that if no one was home, then they could…

     Taekwoon took the time to think about what it was that Sanghyuk was implying. He knew what it was that Sanghyuk wanted. It was not something that he felt he was ready for just yet, but he also knew that it was bound to happen at some point — and he would rather it be a planned moment with Sanghyuk, one that they could take their time with. That was how Taekwoon always imagined it would be.

     “That would be nice.”

 

&

 

     Taekwoon’s fingers were cupping Sanghyuk’s cheeks firmly, kissing him with an unbridled passion as he was pressed up against the bedroom door of the empty dorm. They’d yet to enter his room, but with how Sanghyuk’s body was pressed up against his, Taekwoon knew that it was only a matter of time before the man would take him into the room and lay him over the bed, taking him in a way that he’d only dreamt about.

     Taekwoon was holding onto the man even as Sanghyuk’s mouth separated from his, words passing between them in short whispers filled with heat and passion.

     “Are you sure you’re ready for this, hyung?” Sanghyuk asked right after his teeth had been tugging on Taekwoon’s kiss-swollen lip. His hands were under Taekwoon’s shirt, grasping at his muscular sides and holding him close while also pushing him back against the door. It put Taekwoon between two solid surfaces and left him arching from one and into another. Taekwoon was panting at this point, moving his hands into Sanghyuk’s hair to grip gently and keep the man from pulling away.

     “Yes.”

     The ease in which he breathed it out actually caused surprise to form on Sanghyuk’s expression. This wasn’t something that the maknae would take lightly, which was another reason in which Taekwoon felt _okay_ with giving him this part of him. There was no one else in the world that would understand what this meant to Taekwoon, to be this intimate and give a part of himself no one else would ever get to claim.

     “Okay.”

     Sanghyuk breathed against Taekwoon’s mouth for a moment more before pressing a tender kiss against it. He pulled back only enough to bring Taekwoon away from the door to open it up, guiding the elder backwards into it only to shut the door once more. His large hands were on Taekwoon’s hips at this point, fingers just barely under his shirt and at his skin where he rubbed gentle circles into the flesh. He walked back until they ended up at Taekwoon’s bed. Only then did he turn around and sit down on the edge, looking up at the elder who had a confused expression on his face. Clearly, he assumed he would be on his back for this.

     “Kiss me, hyung.” Sanghyuk urged. He guided the elder to straddle his lap and while it took some maneuvering with long limbs in the way, Taekwoon was settled back on his knees and their mouths were once again pressed together. That earlier passion and desperation hadn’t faded at all, and if anything, it was heightened by that point.

     While they kissed, Taekwoon felt a warming under his skin that he had come to learn all too well meant he was aroused and in need. He needed Sanghyuk to touch more of him, but he didn’t know how to ask for that, how to tell Sanghyuk that, _yes_ , he was _ready_ . He _felt_ ready finally. The only way that his body knew how to convey this was to arch more into Sanghyuk, hike higher up on his lap and press their bodies closer together. His hands gripped at Sanghyuk’s shoulders before they’re clawing at his shirt, drawing it up his back and forcing his arms to rise and the kiss to break to remove it, baring muscle he had imagined himself touching and kissing many times in the past. And while he had leaned back to rid Sanghyuk of his shirt, the reflective actions had occurred to him and he was left shivering as the cool air ran over his heated and flushed skin. But they were finally on their way to something more that Taekwoon knew Sanghyuk had been waiting all these months for so patiently.

     At that point, there was an increase in desire, in need, and Taekwoon could tell this by the way that Sanghyuk was wrapping an arm around his waist to twist them so Taekwoon’s back was against the bed like he initially thought it would be. Taekwoon was once again gripping those strong shoulders, panting as he stared up at the man who could so easily manhandle him, now being encased by him and entirely at his mercy — yet, not a single part of Taekwoon wanted to back out of this like he thought he would. This wasn’t as overwhelming as he feared.

     Or maybe it was; Sanghyuk’s lips were at his neck, nipping at his skin while his hands were working to undo the jeans that Taekwoon wore. It was an intense barrage of sensations that came over him. He was shivering with delight while those lips and talented tongue slid down his skin, getting low enough before he started marking. _Marking_ him. His mouth was moving all over Taekwoon’s chest and even though he wished to know the extent of those marks that would stain his skin, Taekwoon couldn’t stop how his head pressed back against the pillow. He couldn’t stop how his jaw dropped and soft noises were leaving him — ones that had never been made in front of anyone else.

     The way that Sanghyuk so easily drew his clothes from him would have made Taekwoon feel shy if not for the way that his body was so quickly placed back over his, encasing him entirely while he kissed his mouth with a passion that Taekwoon couldn’t keep up with. He felt lightheaded as he was at the mercy of the maknae, feeling that the way he’s being kissed and touched was too much. He almost wanted to back out, to tell Sanghyuk that this was far enough, but then those hands were touching him intimately and Taekwoon was further breathless and out of his mind.

     Sanghyuk’s large hands were at his thighs, guiding them up and apart; then they were at his sides, gripping him to move him further up on the bed where Sanghyuk wanted him; but then they were touching his cock and stroking him to an arousal that he’d never felt before. Never had he felt the pleasure twine in such a painful way, curling in the pit of his stomach, and threatening to unravel him in ways he didn’t know were possible. It was breathtaking to feel Sanghyuk clearly want so much of him, clinging to him even while he helped prepare him for something that Taekwoon had never had.

     And so Taekwoon was clinging to Sanghyuk, holding onto him with a strong grip as there was pressure he never had before, but he wasn’t backing down. He would do this for a multitude of reasons, one of them being that this is what he wanted. He could whimper and whine through it all, even the discomfort and the pain, because he knew that Sanghyuk would be giving him pleasure to go along with it. There would be so much pleasure, he knew; Sanghyuk had promised.

     “You can still change your mind,” Sanghyuk whispered when his own clothes were finally removed and their naked bodies were so intimately entwined that Taekwoon wasn’t able to speak. He shook his head and clung to Sanghyuk more, lifting leg to hook over his hip and urge him on more. “Hyung, please...I need you to tell me. Do you want to stop?”

     Taekwoon felt the way that Sanghyuk was stiff above him, holding himself just centimeters above Taekwoon even though the heat from both of their bodies were radiating unbearably so. He wanted to smack the younger for being such a tease, for working him up to a point, and then holding back in a way that made Taekwoon almost believe that this was all done for fun, for the glory of being the first to have Taekwoon in a way no other had.

     “No, no, Sanghyuk,” Taekwoon found his voice could only manage a whisper. It was light and airy, much different than he’d heard himself ever be before, and yet he was listening more to the sound of his heart pounding from his chest and the sound of blood rushing through his ears. “I don’t want to stop.” He managed in a breath, his gaze glossed over and his expression one of pure _need_. “I want you.” He murmured, because it still made him somewhat shy to say something like that out loud, admit to something he had kept to himself for so long. He never had allowed anyone to have this sort of power over him, and yet there they were…

     Sanghyuk’s lips touched over his forehead, brushing back the sweaty strands with a nudge of his nose before he dropped his forehead to be directly against the other’s. Taekwoon met his gaze even though it was nearly too much to be where he was, staring up into such an intense and love-filled gaze. Sanghyuk was smiling and his lower half was shifting to press closer to Taekwoon’s willing, open body. It was a tense set of moments, the way they stared at one another while Sanghyuk prepared to penetrate him. He pressed through the tension, guided by a small nod from Taekwoon, and he pushed himself inside.

     Nothing could have prepared Taekwoon for the mixture of sensations that shoot through his body. It was a standoff between pleasure and pain when something — _Sanghyuk_ — presses inside of him. It was a first, the way the man was holding onto him, kissing his skin, whispering into his ear — things that Taekwoon would have to ask him about later. It was all so much, but he was already trying to get more of him.

     His dull nails were scoring down Sanghyuk’s back, drawing those large muscles closer to him while Sanghyuk began to rock into him again and again — every motion punctuated with a sharp rock upward when he sat inside of the elder — and Taekwoon didn’t think that he could handle much of it, as much as he wished he could forever be lost in this euphoria that only Sanghyuk could claim to ever given to him.

     Taekwoon gasped when Sanghyuk reached for his hands and guided his arms up above his head. His eyes were wide when Sanghyuk’s hand slid into his own, lacing their fingers together and using them as leverage to keep his hips moving. If anything, the pleasure was only increasing and Taekwoon was only growing loudly. It was intimate, extremely so. And Taekwoon wondered if he would survive it if it continued like that for much longer. He was feeling everything build and build and he knew that it would come crashing down soon enough.

     Sanghyuk’s noises were growing in his ears, the soft grunts he was releasing; his hips were moving with a bit more force, drawing out louder noises form Taekwoon; and his fingers were tightening as they gripped Taekwoon’s. But there was a resistance in his movements after a point and Taekwoon realized that it had to do with the effort it took to keep himself in check, and that was just another thing to bring Taekwoon to his competition.

     It was white hot pleasure that shot through Taekwoon, pleasure that was much different than the few times he’d taken care of himself in the shower. It was almost painful when it shot through him, burning every single nerve ending and replacing it with something so euphoric that Taekwoon would feel that word to be inadequate for the things that it made him feel. The way that Sanghyuk made him feel was beyond what he had ever imagined and he was clinging to the maknae with an unrelenting grip, shuddering through an orgasm that caused the only thing to be released from his mouth again and again was Sanghyuk’s name.

     Pure bliss

 

&

 

     Taekwoon’s fingers traced the lines on Sanghyuk’s hand while they were curled in bed together, bare underneath the blanket. His touch was light while Sanghyuk just watched his hand be touched in such a light manner. It caused him to shiver now and again, but for the most part, Sanghyuk simply had a smile on his face — one that cause Taekwoon’s mouth to mirror the emotion.

     “I love you.” Taekwoon spoke with such gentleness that it was almost unheard by Sanghyuk who, when he finally understood what was said, smiled and repeated the words back to him.

     It was clear that Sanghyuk had been waiting for him to say it, patient as ever, as always after all this time. It was clear that Taekwoon was the one who had been holding their relationship back, kept it from growing and developing further. And it was clear that—

     “Stop thinking.” Sanghyuk’s voice chuckled out, his arms shifting to let his hand slip from Taekwoon’s, drawing the smaller man further up into his embrace. He knew Taekwoon and would only further prove it, with the things he said, by the things he did, and the way he made Taekwoon feel. His patience had been more than that, and Taekwoon would one day thank him for it, but right then, Taekwoon would do as he was asked, giving back just a fraction of what he’d taken from the younger. It was only right.

 

&

 

     Taekwoon’s fingers slid through his hair, brushing it out of the way while they sat and laughed in the living room with the others. He was nearly on top of Sanghyuk’s lap, the younger man having wrapped an arm around his waist and held him close without thinking to censor any of their affections. They had no reason to when it was clear to all the others just how close they had grown over the last however many months it took for them to work up to what they were.

     Sanghyuk was smiling against the side of Taekwoon’s head, pressing a kiss through his hair and nuzzling against him, brushing those fingers when they ran through his hair. He even went as far to nip the knuckle of one playfully. It drew Taekwoon’s gaze to him, bright and expressive. It no longer felt as subdued when he looked at Sanghyuk, no longer anything in them that needed to be hidden.

     Taekwoon dropped his hand back to his lap, taking one of those large hands into his and entwining their fingers, squeezing gently while the tips of his nails just lightly scratched at his palm; it was their own language, their own way to express their desire and need for one another without verbalizing it. Sanghyuk squeezed back, holding tight to Taekwoon’s hand even as the conversation in the group took another turn, someone going off topic as they normally did. Even though they were all talking over one another, jokes being told, and stories being started but never finished, Taekwoon couldn’t find himself willing to pay attention to it.

     Sanghyuk kept their hands tangled, kept them together as yet another distraction from what was going on, taking all of Taekwoon’s attention for himself and seeming to have no guilt about it. But Taekwoon had known that he would be just that, from the first moment that he really allowed their hands to be interlaced.


End file.
